dog and donkey

Dog walk fail

I live by 2 dog walking codes…

1: If, when you approach another dog who is on its lead, put your dogs on theirs.
If the other dogs are not on a lead, then that’s their owner’s way of saying 1 of 2 things.
The first is “I can’t control my dog on a lead so let’s just hope this ends well with no blood drawn or unplanned pregnancies”
And the second is “I don’t mind your dog chasing my dog into the distance, nor do I mind them shagging them crap out of them”

2: Always pick up their doings, even if there is nobody about because a child might put it into their eye balls and become blind.

Neither of these codes however, helped me much this afternoon.
I took both my dogs for a walk along the sea wall today, which was fine until I ended up being dragged along the ground in front of two strangers.

On the sea wall there is a pill box which sticks out into the river which has 2 park benches on the top.
The sun was setting so I decided to stop and take some pictures.
I tried to get a photo of both dogs looking out over the river so they appeared to be admiring the pink sunset, but I couldn’t get the boxer / lab ‘Cooper’ to sit still long enough.
Determined to take a good picture I folded my dog ‘Jasper’s’ ears inside out and made him sit on the bench wearing my sunglasses.
Just as I was setting up the epic shot, I noticed Cooper’s attention turn to an approaching couple with a dog.

Thinking at a glance that their dog was on a lead, I quickly lassoed my two’s necks with their leads and in an attempt to look the professional dog walker, I continued towards them, dog in each hand.
Now I knew my dogs were going to be awkward once we passed each other, I was even ready for them to pull on their leads a bit.
What I wasn’t prepared for is for Cooper to jump Jasper’s lead spinning me round and pulling me off balance as he tried to get to the couples dog.
In my right hand, along with jasper’s lead I had a full poo bag which slipped from my grip at the same time as the lead.
In slow motion I fell to the ground, landing on the now open poo bag. Both dogs ran off, towing me through the shit and leaving me laying on my back inbetween the couples feet.

I quickly scurried to my feet, hoping they wouldn’t notice the dog crap up my trousers and said “nice evening”
The couple didn’t say much really, they didn’t help me up or nothing, they just continued to walk on with their dog, WHO WASN’T ON A LEAD!

I’m sure they had a good laugh about it once they were far enough away.

From now on Cooper’s lead will be attached to his balls.

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